Welcoming 2021

As I ready myself for welcoming 2021, I have received several emails from trusted woman whom I deeply respect. Rather than reworking what they have each so eloquently written, I am posting their messages unaltered . . . for your deep consideration as we are about to exit the most difficult year for everyone living on Planet Earth. I trust each of you will find something poignant and meaningful in both of these communique.

Dwight in the parking lot  of the Upaya Zen Center donating his Mu sculpture for their Prajna Mountain Forest Refuge. We are delighted that Roshi Joan Halifax accepted this sculpture that Dwight created for  MuRefuge, Sebastopol, California. A good friend of mine said, "You are married to sorrow." And I looked at him and said, "I am not married to sorrow. I just choose not to look away." And I think there is deep beauty in not averting our gaze. No matter how hard it is, no matter how heartbreaking it can be. It is about presence. It is about bearing witness. I used to think bearing witness was a passive act. I don't believe that anymore. I think that when we are present, when we bear witness, when we do not divert our gaze, something is revealed—the very marrow of life. We change. A transformation occurs. Our consciousness shifts.      —Terry Tempest Williams   On this last fullmoon of the year, we reflect that this has been a year like no other, a year few of us could have ever imagined… a year of loss, a year of uncertainty, a year of adapting… or not. Today, some billions of people around the world are under lock-down, more people than were alive during World War II. Most governments have told us to reduce our lives to the smallest social unit: the household. When we leave our homes, when we go out to pick up groceries or mail a package, we stay six feet apart from everyone else. Someone wrote that we are like magnets with reversed polarities, sliding off pavements onto roads, around cars; anything to avoid being close to others.    We are social animals. Our evolution is built upon the ability to communicate and cooperate, not just through words but also through body language, physical contact, and intimacy. The effects of this year on every single one of us will extend far beyond the change in current everyday behaviors. And the effects of this pandemic on health care providers and our medical system will be felt far into the future.    Yes, this year has been a crisis of the heart and mind that goes right to the core of how we live as social beings, how we deal with fear and loss, and how we die, and how we serve.    In the midst of all this, one has to ask: How are we doing? What are we learning? How have we resourced ourselves in this midst of lockdown or the high demands and stress of caregiving? What have we taken refuge in? How are we dealing with the many losses we are experiencing now, including the massive loss of human life at this time? What is loss and radical uncertainty teaching us? How have we served others? What does it mean to live by vow in this time of great suffering?   I look at our practice at Upaya as finding (and fumbling) our way into the eye of a storm. When we sit in our zendo, we find our posture...still, upright, steadfast. We try to do things precisely and gently. We endeavor to do things together and with each other and for each other. We struggle, fail, and hopefully learn.   And we remind each other that things could get worse before they get better and to trust that we can move through sorrow and fear toward a life that is characterized by thriving, if we meet our suffering with patience and curiosity. And we have to keep in mind that this is not easy……..    In her novel “Regeneration,” Pat Barker writes of a doctor who 'knew only too well how often the early stages of change or cure may mimic deterioration. Cut a chrysalis open, and you will find a rotting caterpillar. …No, the process of transformation consists almost entirely of decay.” We would agree… a year of decay…. but also possibility….   We have seen vividly that loss is a natural part of life, as is fear. If we are able to see that loss can teach us and fear can reveal our edges and priorities, we can begin to understand that grief and fear are part of a natural process of transformation, and more so now, as we face these strange and terrible times.   And we have to remind each other that no matter what we do, it does not mean that our lives will go back to how they were before, and also that working through grief and fear, we can be vastly transformed through our experience of facing our suffering.   Kentucky poet Wendell Berry describes the sycamore not far from his house: Fences have been tied to it, nails driven into it, hacks and whittles cut in it, the lightning has burned it. There is no year it has flourished in that has not harmed it. . . . It has risen to a strange perfection in the warp and bending of its long growth. It has gathered all accidents into its purpose. It has become the intention and radiance of its dark fate.   What does it mean to gather all accidents into our purpose and become the intention and radiance of our dark fate? We must remind each other that people who have survived great loss, great harm can come back transformed by the experience, and see that their suffering has made them more resilient rather than more fragile, with the ability to thrive in the present rather than being overwhelmed by the past. Beyond the ending of the old way of life, there is hope for the emergence of the new, and we can imagine a future in which our wounds are still there, but in a form that both reconnects us and makes us wiser and humbler.    We are reminded of Nelson Mandela, Malala, His Holiness the Dalai Lama, and so many others who have encountered violence, sickness, incarceration, loss, and more…………. They thrived and have inspired others to thrive.....meaning growth, radiance, beyond survival. This includes the blessing of humility, a deeper relationship with others, the anticipation of new and braver possibilities in the future, the nourishment of moral character, a profound sense of spiritual transformation, and a greater appreciation for life.   Maya Angelou once wrote “My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive…………” Now and in this coming year, may we have the causes and conditions, as well as the courage and wisdom to thrive, serve, and to lean into the light in the midst of what we are facing today.   No culture has yet solved the dilemma each has faced with the growth of a conscious mind: how to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in all life, when one finds darkness not only in one's own culture, but within oneself.  If there is a stage at which an individual life becomes truly adult, it must be when one grasps the irony in its unfolding and accepts the responsibility for a life lived in the midst of such paradox. There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light.   —Barry Lopez (January 6, 1945 – December 25, 2020), from Arctic Dreams   Two hands together, Rev. Joan Jiko Halifax Abbot, Upaya Zen Center Santa Fe, NM The Cathedral Basilica of St. Francis of Assisi off the downtown Plaza in Santa Fe, NM in the very early morning light during this holiday season.

My New Year’s Wish, Prayer, Blessing, and Resolution:

May the isolation, fear and loss we have suffered in this past year

make us more appreciative of our friends, loved ones, and coworkers,

and more aware of how vitally we need community.

May the callousness, irresponsibility and corruption 

we have seen in power holders, make us

appreciate the value of truth, integrity, and caring 

in our leaders.

May the barrage of lies, disinformation 

and conspiracy theories that flood the internet 

inspire us to hone our critical thinking 

and strengthen our capacity for good judgement.

May the injustices we have witnessed and suffered

deepen our commitment 

to dismantle systems of oppression.

May the fires, floods, hurricanes and disasters 

of this last year 

make us more aware

that we are subject to nature's laws, 

and more determined to bring us into balance.

May this coming year be a turning point -

toward a world of more compassion, more caring,

more sharing, more integrity, more courage, more health,

more regeneration, and more joy 

in being agents of justice and renewal.

Starhawk, 10:52am, 12/30/2020

As we let go of all that 2020 bestowed upon us, may we avoid BEing victims and celebrate all that is possible in 2021. Actually, "celebrate what's right" as our friend Dewitt Jones offers this profound message for viewing our world to each and every one of us.

Welcoming this new year is like no other welcoming of another new year. 2021 holds immense possibilities, opportunities, adventures, renewed friendships and reconnecting with family as the pandemic loosens its grasp on all of us. All of us here are looking forward to welcoming 2021. In March we will be biding farewell to our Stamm home in Santa Fe, New Mexico, and begin rerooting back in Sonoma County, California. 

As we welcome 2021 may each and everyone of us

2020 Winter Solstice

"This is a time to celebrate all that warms us and gives us hope," Starhawk

The longest night of the year occurs on the Winter Solstice, December 21, 2020, in the Northern hemisphere. It marks the end of Fall and the official start of Winter. The Winter Solstice is an ancient pagan holiday with traditions celebrating nature and setting one's intentions for the coming season. These customs and practices resemble those of celebrating the Christian holiday, Christmas, which is annually on December 25.

Being the shortest day of the year means a shortened time of daylight. This being said, candlelight is one of the original traditions of celebrating the Winter Solstice both for the needed light and to celebrate in the coming months the return of the sun.

As another tradition for celebrating the pagan Yule holiday (rather than Christmas the Christian holiday) you might put up a Yule tree. My preference in my adult life has been the Pinon Pine with a distinct fragrance that fills any space in which it is placed. When living in California we cut a fresh tree in the National Forest, with a permit of course, on our return to MuRefuge from the Mono Lake area. Now living in Santa Fe, New Mexico, we obtain a permit and also go into the local National Forest for just the right Pinon Pine to cut and transport to our 1955 Stamm home.

Gift exchanging is also part of celebrating, perhaps focusing on "earth based" gifts like seeds for the local birds. Feathered Friends of Santa Fe has mixture of seeds for different locales. We use the mixture called Canyon Road blend since it brings such a diversity of birds to our feeders in the Winter. 

Other gift ideas are small hand made wreaths decorated with objects gleaned while out hiking in nature or beautiful crystals. Here in Santa Fe we have an awesome shop, Ark Books, that has a fine array of crystals for purchase.

Burning the Yule log is also very popular for those who have fireplaces in which to do so. Pinon Pine logs release that luscious iconic smell into the room to the delight of all who are fond of a lighted fire in the fireplace.

And honoring Mother Earth by enjoying a hike out in nature is another popular way of celebrating Winter Solstice. The area surrounding Santa Fe, NM, has numerous trails. There are almost too many enticing ones to make a decision about which one to take at any given time. My fantasy is to drive to Chaco Canyon which would make for a very long day driving to and from. If you do decide to take a hike on the Yule holiday, breath in the fresh air and allow the gentle breeze to wash away your worries..

And perhaps the very best activity, or actually non activity, is luxuriating in resting, as Booch and Billie are below. These kitties are new household members in Seattle with their Mom and Dad, aka Leigh and Steven.

Or even napping as are Chloe and Pearl, above, napping nose to nose. These kitties live in San Francisco with their Mom and Dad, aka Katie and Michael.

Whichever holiday we choose to celebrate this month in what ever way we choose, may we all thoroughly enjoy a 

Thanksgiving, 2020

 

Shasta napping in one of her
favorite shady backyard spots.
I thank Shasta's mobile vet. who provides
not only acupuncture but guidance in
keeping Shasta healthy.

Thanksgiving Day is just around the corner. This holiday in 2020 will be like none other in most of our lives as we stay home without any guests, including any dearly loved family and friends. COVID-19 is killing off our fellow citizens at record rates all over the country. Mask wearing, social distancing, washing our hands for 20 seconds when returning from contact away from home and "sheltering in place" are the only ways we can prevent one another from dying of this deadly disease.

That said at this Thanksgiving (and Dwight's and my anniversary) I must say I am filled with thankfulness for so many reasons. Getting the most attention at this moment is my returning good health and well BEing fostered by my amazing Asian Healing Arts doctor.

Pearl and Cloe, cats of our children living in San Francisco 

Also, I am thankful that January 20, 2021, the inauguration of Joe Biden and Kamal Harris, is now less than two months away. 

And as those of you who follow this blog are aware I am passionate about restoring native habitat. Without the vast array of natives at Plants of the Southwest and its fabulous owner I could not have created the awesome gardens here in Santa Fe, New Mexico. And a shout out of great thank you to Tooley's Trees  as well, who provided all of our flourishing fruit trees; and Coates Tree Service for the many truckloads of woods chips delivered at a frightfully minimal cost.

And here I would like to expressed my deepest thank you to my husband for all the support when I run myself ragged taking care of the burgeoning food forest beginning to thrive in our backyard. Also, I am so appreciative for all the physical effort it took him to build our three raised beds, turning two of them into hoop houses for thriving vegetables here in this high mountainous desert tiny plot of land. 

Also, I am full of thankfulness for both my chosen by marriage and biological family. As well, I give thanx for both long time friends scattered near and wide as well as the developing friendships here in Santa Fe.

I am so thankful to live in a neighborhood filled with diversity. Different religions and political affiliations make for lively conversations. We have a delightful young Chinese couple with two adorable girls, one not quite one year old and another soon to be three. Next door lives a “geek” who does research at Los Alamos Labs and hails from British Columbia. His lovely wife who is completing the rigors to BE an architect grew up in Chihuahua, Mexico. Then there is the mom of Hank, Shasta’s very favorite neighbor dog, who added what looks like a space ship atop her Stamm home. Eek, I thought when we first drove down our street. As I am getting to know her, she is not only engaging, thoughtful, and knowledgeable but she shares many of my values. And she is raising an enchanting teenaged son.

Booch ( short for Kombucha)
the male kitty of our children living in Seattle, Washington

                                                                                                                                                                                                                    

In the recently purchased Stamm home where the oldest person on our cul da sac lived resides a gay couple with their cutest little daughter, Olena, named for the Hawaiian turmeric flower. They along with their parents who live here in Santa Fe are creating a lovely front yard.

Billie, as in Billie Holliday, Booch's sister.

Then in the other Stamm homes live people of varying ages, both single and married. Across the street we enjoy the late middle aged Hispanic Catholic couple. Not only are they Catholic but they practice their religion deeply. To me the man demonstrates many of the characteristics of Joe Biden, but they vote for Trump because he does not believe in abortions (m-m-m-m). 

Pearl

Next door to them lives a midlife couple. She is from Pakistan and he works at home but is employed by Los Alamos Labs. They have a stunningly beautiful adopted daughter who if I remember correctly is from Japan.

I have to say I am in love with
Billie's marble coat, finding it ever so stunning.

And next to them lives a 60ish single woman whose family many generations ago migrated to New Mexico from Spain. She grew up in the house she lives in and holds a plethora of knowledge about the area.

Booch

The house down our street that we originally thought we would buy was purchased by an artist soon after we withdrew our bid. She use to be employed by Meow Wolf but they now have “fired” all of their artists. She creates wonderful, very large sculptures in her garage. Luckily she often leaves the garage door open so we can enjoy her works in progress. 

And across San Felipe Avenue lives the mom of the little white dog Minnie and who shares snickerdoodles with us during holiday season. She and I also have great talks about sports in general and in particular the Houston Astros, since her family is friends with their third baseman, and Oakland Athletics whose midweek afternoon games I use to attend with Shasta's Auntie T and my dear friend that I miss dearly. Shasta's Auntie Rosa cleans our house monthly and she was a marvelous find as well a delightful person hailing from El Paso, Texas.

So as we celebrate our lives at this 2020 Thanksgiving, and realize all the benefits with which we are blessed and positive happenings every single day, may we also enjoy a divine

 

Necessary

“Let us meet this present moment with clarity, strength, and love."  

Rev. Joan Jiko Halifax

Beargrass (Nolina microcarpa) in the snow
along with Dwight's stunning sculpture.

We are at the end of a five year cycle of chaos. This cycle seems to have been necessary to bring to the fore so many issues in our country having previously been swept "under the rug" so to speak: white supremacy that abused women, children, people of color and just about anyone else who was not a white man. Five years ago amidst so much dissatisfaction among the United States inhabitants our 45th President ran for office. People were unhappy with the lack of movement by our Congress and wanted a change. Well indeed change happened The present inhabitant of our White House brought change unlike anything heretofore seen by a President.  His outrageous tweets, the seemingly only way this man communicated, constantly stirred things up so the "norm" was totally unrecognizable. 

With daily startling happenings obliterated any sense of normalcy, the #Me2Movement gained traction with the sexual harassment and sexual assault finally honored for what it was instead of blaming the children and women who had experienced such awful invasion of their persons. "They asked for it" attitude seemed no longer a justification in courts of law.

And the general populous no longer went along with the police brutality of black men and women too. Huge and diverse crowds gathered in the streets in many American cities to march against the killing of black men and women in the name of "the law". Many athletes in all of major league sports took to their platforms standing up against the atrocities measured out on many black men. These now "famous" men often related how they had been pulled over by the police. Some even shared how they had been "locked up" but never charged nor been allow legal counsel or even a phone call before being released. Black Lives Matter has become a movement all Americans regardless of color are participating in.

Complacency had befallen voters all over the country. People abdicated their responsibility to BE involved and vote. Then citizens began to recognize the importance of voting. Hundreds of thousands of postcards and letters were written to encourage this act. In the election of 2020 people showed up and voted in records numbers either with "mail in" ballots or going to the polls to vote in person.

Here in Santa Fe, New Mexico,
we are so often presented with beautiful clouds as these.

So my take today is that the man sitting in our White House was necessary to awaken all of us living in the United States to participate and not be complacent. I remember Starhawk, many years ago, saying that people get what they deserve if they do not vote. Minimal voter turnout of 2016 allowed a sociopathic narcissist to move into our White House.

I for one am elated that come January 20, 2021, in Washington, D.C., we will have a president inaugurated who will respect tradition, undo all of the terribly detrimental proclamations of the past four years and support national as well as individual healing of every citizen in this country. I trust that a sense of stability will return so that we as a nation can get on with necessary action to combat the climate catastrophe as well as more effectively deal with the COVID-19 pandemic.

Also, I am ever so excited to see the effects of a woman of color as VicePresident on our nation.

Until that momentous celebration, as we are continue to be inundated with shenanigans by the present White House occupant, many we

Halloween

Pumpkin On A Stick (Solanum aethiopicum)

with the ceramic skull created by Dwight

and Day of the Dead skeletons

adorning our front "hallway".

One of our neighbors loves Halloween. She tells us that it is her favorite holiday of the whole year. MidOctober each year her yard decorations become more and more elaborate. Dwight and I wonder how she get the witches up in their huge Cottonwood tree?

As we prepare to celebrate the Blue (second in the month of October) Full Moon on a different kind of Halloween during this pandemic, may we also enjoy a good belly

Turning

 

Cottonwood leaves turning golden
along the Santa Fe River Trail.

“It’s a challenging time—

but also an exciting time 

as the forces of change gather strength, 

and the veil thins 

between the world of the seen and the unseen!  

 This is the time to ground, 

to weave the webs of resilience 

that keep us connected to our loved ones—

those who are alive 

and those who are on the other side of the veil—

to commit to defending our democracy, 

to claim our power 

and raise our voices!”  STARHAWK 10/17/20

As we look around us may we “celebrate what’s right with the world”. And may we all notice the turning of seasons so enthusiastically demonstrated by the leaves changing from all shades of Summer greens to a myriad of Fall colors. Here are a few pictures taken in my garden just a week ago or so.

Hargrande Apricot tree leaves

Saint Theresa red grape vine 
with the morning sun shining
through the turning leaves.

Big Bluestem (Andropogon gerardii)
native to the tall grass prairies

Chokecherry (Prunus virginiana)

Woods’ Rose (Rosa woodsii)

One fourth cord of Pinon Pine firewood
from EcoFirewood 
now covered to be kept dry
and ready for burning in our fireplace.

This picture below was taken around noon this Tuesday past from our door to the backyard. At this time of the year we are usually enjoying our midday meal and/ or our evening meal outside at this glass topped table we inherited from Dwight's granny.

“Early winter storms in New Mexico 

are a mixed blessing, 

reminding us of the storms in our country

and the storms in our world. 

Storms bring moisture to our parched land 

in the high desert southwest, 

and they clear the air 

of the heavy smoke 

from the terrible fires north and west of us.” 

UPAYA Institute and Zen Center (10/27/20)

As we await Halloween, All Saints' Day and the 2020 election results, may we celebrate what's right with world and 

Grief

 Condor perched atop of the bluff of the

Colorado River running through the Grand Canyon.

I for one am experiencing enormous grief about the human caused climate catastrophe. The wildfires in California has disrupted the condors habitat leaving 9 adults missing. These magnificent birds are now fewer.

The California condor (Gymnogyps californianus) 

is a New world vulture, 

the largest North American land bird. 

This condor became extinct in the wild in 1987 

(all remaining wild individuals were captured), 

but the species has since been reintroduced to 

northern Arizona and southern Utah 

(including the Grand Canyon area and Zion National Park), 

the coastal mountains of central and southern California, 

and northern Baja California. 

Although other fossil members are known, 

it is the only surviving member of the genus Gymnogyps. 

The species is listed by the IUCN* as critically endangered.

May 2, 2019 by Dr. Roger Lederer

in Ornithology: The Science of Birds

*International Union for Conservation of Nature 

 

Millions of birds, and a disproportional number of swallows, have been found dead. Bird experts are puzzled and working on figuring out what happened. The most recent explanation is that the migratory birds in California were forced to leave before they readied their bodies for the lengthy flight South. Then the cold snap happened in the Southwest as they were flying through so no insects were available hence birds were literally dropping from starvation. Their carcasses were mere skeletons.

 

                                                              Tree Swallow sitting on a barbwire fence

                                                               near the Point Reyes National Seashore, California.

Earth mother, star mother,

you who are called by 

a thousand names,

May all remember

we are cells in your body

and dance together.

You are the grain

and the loaf

That sustains us each day, 

And as you are patient

with our struggles to learn

So shall we be patient

with our struggles to learn

So shall we be patient

with ourselves and each other.

We are radiant light

and sacred dark

- the balance -

You are the embrace that heartens

And the freedom beyond fear.

Within you we are born

we grow, live, and die -

You bring us around the circle 

to rebirth,

Within us you dance

Forever.

STARHAWK

Focusing on balance as we deal with all the emotions swirling around and in each of us, may we breathe deeply and have a wonderfully releasing